Pictures: Lil Wayne Performs At Winstar Casino In Oklahoma
On December 29th, Lil Wayne had a concert in Thackerville, Oklahoma at the Winstar Casino. Check out some photos of Weezy F Baby, who was rocking an Earl hoodie, performing at the show after the jump below. You can also watch some footage of Tune performing “She Will” and skateboarding in the parking lot after [...]
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Pictures: Lil Wayne Performs At Winstar Casino In Oklahoma
Taylor Swift W/The Civil Wars – Safe & Sound
. Taylor Swift has participated in the soundtrack and has joined with one of her (and our) favorite bands from 2011: The Civil Wars. Take a listen to the song here and let us know what you …
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Taylor Swift W/The Civil Wars – Safe & Sound
Captain Kirk Has Taken Too Much LSD
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Back to the Ship – Kirk is totally tripping balls. NSFW due to the Total Recall chick at 3:51.
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Captain Kirk Has Taken Too Much LSD
Orlando Jones: 2011 #OccupyComedy
2011 was a huge year for comedy. That statement is only true if you focus on the exception, Louis C.K. and not the rule, Ricky Gervais. Mister Gervais showed up to host the Golden Globes armed with real live jokes. “Our next presenter is from such films as ‘Hudson Hawk,’ ‘Look Who’s Talking,’ ‘Mercury Rising,’ ‘Color of Night,’ ‘The Fifth Element’ and ‘Hart’s War.’ Please welcome Ashton Kutcher’s dad, Bruce Willis,” he said. The Golden Globes organizers went through the roof. They vowed to never have him back so next year get ready for the comedy stylings of Maya Angelou… no wait, Gervais was asked back. If he pisses folks off again this year James Franco and Anne Hathaway will be available for 2013. They were just splendid hosting the 2011 Academy Awards. The line I most enjoyed that evening was “goodnight.” Simply brilliant.
In 2011, the apologies rolled in one after another from satirists, comedians and even Pope Benedict. The Holy Father apologized for Christians’ use of violence throughout history including holy wars, inquisitions and crusades. “We acknowledge it with great shame,” he said. It was hard to take him seriously while wearing that hat.
With an apology on record from the head Shepherd of the Universal Church you’d think everyone could find it in their heart to say, “I’m sorry.” Nope. The rapper Drake was fighting mad with Kevin Campbell. Campbell is the tattoo artist that inked Drake’s name in huge block letters across a female fan’s forehead. “The guy who tatted is a f*cking as*hole though, I will tell you that,” he said. “You should lose your job and should never do tattoos again. And if I ever see you, I’m a f*ck you up.” I’m glad nothing bad happened but this may be the worst tough guy talk of the century. I’m surry (Canadian pronunciation) Aubrey Drake Graham is and far more likely to hashtag rap Kevin Campbell to death. I’m not saying Campbell was right. All I’m saying is when Mike Tyson got his face tattooed, Tyson’s manager probably did the same tough guy talk to that tattoo artist. But- and here’s the important detail – I bet you he didn’t say a word to Tyson. The manger most likely told Mike how handsome he looked. How he always wanted a face tattoo himself. How it was going to get Tyson more movie roles. How if Mel Gibson had a face tattoo the cast of Hangover II wouldn’t have objected to having him in the film. “You’re a convicted rapist. Mel Gibson has no criminal record but they choose you. Why? Face tattoo. You’re a genius, Mike.”
Comedian Tracy Morgan found himself embroiled in controversy for telling a crowd in Nashville’s Ryman Auditorium that he’d “pull out a knife and stab his son” if he were gay. Mister Morgan has sincerely apologized for this joke many times. I’m not defending him. I think what he should have said was he’d stab his son if he were straight. Boys sleeping with girls is old news. It’s been done to death. Tracy should have challenged his son to be maverick, a trailer blazer. Follow in the footsteps of the notable gay men that have made the world a better place. What father hasn’t whispered those words of encouragement into their sleeping infant son’s ears? Please raise your hands one at a time. We cannot get an accurate count if all the fathers raise their hands at once. Thank you.
In the midst of one Arab uprising after another, comedy satire continued to take heavy blows. If this is the first time you are hearing about the Arab Spring you may have been too busy popping Cymbalta and watching Portlandia.
Looking to capitalize on coup d’etats Kenneth Cole tweeted “Millions are in uproar in #Cairo. Rumor is they heard our new spring collection is now available online at http://bit.ly/KCairo — KC.” Mr. Cole apologized, although several people blamed Obama for Cole’s tweet. “We want to see his birth certificate. If Mr. Obama thinks he can fool the American people about his Muslim past with floral print dresses he is sadly mistaken!” shouted a man named Donnie holding a “Will Work for Food” sign. When Donnie was asked what he thought the rest of us were working for, Mr. Trump fell to his knees and wept. “I never thought of it that way,” he said through tears. Look out for his new show, Occupy Apprentice. If Johnny Depp can take a joke, Donald Trump sure can. Check out this clip.
The most insane story of the year was Vajazzling. That’s where women vahbazzle their va-jay-z with cupcake sprinkles. Where did these ridiculous words come from? I know where vajazzling came from; it was Clitter. That’s when ladies decorate their private parts with glitter. I’m not making this up. After vajazzling came the newest beauty trend Twatoos. A permanent or temporary tattoo on your happy hole. I’m sorry I’m running out of ways to reference a woman’s shame cave without sounding vulgar. Unfortunately ladies, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but men don’t care how you decorate your ninja slipper.
It wasn’t all bad for fashion in 2011. Street style star Shala Monroque blogged her way into the hearts of millions of women and Wonderful magazine’s fashion editor Julia Sarr-Jamois was a stunning visual inspiration. These ladies are not the manufactured style untouchables we have become accustomed to. They are the real deal.
Patrice O’Neal was picked on for having diabetes at the Charlie Sheen roast, then died after a stroke. Let me say that again, Patrice O’Neal was picked on for having diabetes at the Charlie Sheen roast. I guess Charlie was too easy a target. Mister O’Neal will be missed. What an amazing and talented guy.
On the hand, when crack cocaine wants to party it snorts an eight ball of Charlie Sheen. Don’t quote me on that. I read it in the top comments on an exclusive Sheen interview video on YouTube from Mare9555. It had 48 “likes” so that makes it true. Just like everything on Wikipedia, the online encyclopedia that anyone can edit. Charlie Sheen was proven sober in that bizarre interview. I’m sorry, if that’s sober I’m dying to see him high. You don’t have to like Sheen or condone drug use. You don’t even have to agree with his life choices. You do have to admit that Sheen did something we all want. He got paid not to go to work. By anyone’s standards, that’s winning. For those of you keeping score on who apologized and who didn’t, that’s: Pope — 1. Comedians — 1. Satirists — 1. Drake and Sheen — 0.
No year-in-review wrap up would be complete without mentioning the Occupy movement, Casey Anthony, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Herman Cain and Kim Kardashian. Don’t worry. I’ll be brief.
Occupy movement: There is no Occupy movement in the black community. When you occupy Martin Luther King Boulevard we just call it homeless.
Casey Anthony: After the not guilty verdict I changed my name from Orlando to Boca Raton Jones. I can be reached at the Jewish Community Center. If the rabbi is not available I know everything he does. Don’t mix meat and milk. It’s not kosher plus it’s nasty. Don’t eat pork, it will give you trichinosis and what not. Marry a Jewish girl and make your mother happy.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: I don’t know how it works in Austria, but in America we use our housekeepers for cleaning.
Herman Cain: After announcing he was dropping out of the Republican presidential race, Herman Cain drove away in his car singing, “I got nine-nine-nine problems, but a bitch ain’t one.”
Kim Kardashian: See my Naughty or Nice blog post.
Comedy took a beating, but it will survive. My concern is not for the survival of laughter — it is for upcoming generations. Bullies aren’t powerful. They are sad angry cowards. Kindness is not a weakness. It shows character, poise and strength. I worry that the truth is losing the war. I worry that the thought police are doing far more harm than good, despite their noble intentions. These are my fears and maybe I am alone in them.
Maybe I am alone in believing that laughter helps us endure our hardships.
Over the last few years I asked God to grant me two wishes. In 2009 I wanted a black president. So little kids who grew up like me could know being commander-in-chief was possible. I’d like to see a female president too. In 2011 my second wish was for a full NBA season. God gave me half and half. With one wish left I’m saving it. This time I’m not asking God for anything. I’m asking myself. How can I do better?
And if I don’t figure it out, me and Tracy Morgan are gonna get somebody pregnant.
Happy New Year!
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Orlando Jones: 2011 #OccupyComedy
Sargent House Offering Free Contract Advice to Bands
Sargent House owner Cathy Pellow has set up an email offering free contract advice to bands being courted by labels, booking agents, etc, to help prevent artists from signing bad deals.
“I am setting up a FREE advice email for any bands out there that have been sent a written contract to sign by a label, booking agent, marketing firm, label scout, manager – whatever,” Pellow stated. “I’m begging all bands to NEVER just sign without first getting some real advice and understanding of what it is you are agreeing too.”
Pellow added, “Too many times the reason bands don’t get outside advice has been for lack of funds to get a professional lawyer to advise them before signing and so I’m offering this FREE. Take it or leave it, you don’t have to listen to me but at least you can be more prepared to know what you are getting yourself into and with who.”
Further information can be found over at Sargent House’s Tumblr page. Bands seeking advice should contact Pellow at advice@sargenthouse.com.
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Sargent House Offering Free Contract Advice to Bands
Katatonia to Enter Studio
Katatonia have plans to enter the studio during the first couple months of the New Year to record their ninth studio album, expected in late spring.
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Katatonia to Enter Studio
Watch: Live Times Sq. New Year’s Eve Webcast Feat. Lady Gaga, Drake & More
Watch the live six-hour webcast from Times Square right here.
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Watch: Live Times Sq. New Year’s Eve Webcast Feat. Lady Gaga, Drake & More
RARHOFAM: Hall of Lame
Music Industry Newswire COLUMN: After several visits to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum, the primary reactions were trepidation and consternation. The building itself is quite impressive but the well-packaged contents of the RARHOFAM are often silly and ultimately insignificant.
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RARHOFAM: Hall of Lame
Listen To Unreleased R. Kelly Tracks “I Quit You” And “Nothing On”
Hopefully this past year was a good one, but if not, a new R. Kelly song might just be the perfect anthem for you to send off 2011 — “I Quit You,” which may sound like a happy-go-lucky love song, but is actually about getting rid of a no-good lady. Of course, depending on your New Year’s Eve plans, your midnight kiss may find “Nothing On” a more appropriate jam to ring in 2012. Just as it sounds, this one finds the sea cruiser praising the joys of nudity R&B-style. (Not even a G-string or Playboy bunny outfit will do.) But beware: the dripping noise that plays throughout this song may just drive you crazy. Listen below.
Which of these is more appropriate for your New Year celebration?
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Listen To Unreleased R. Kelly Tracks “I Quit You” And “Nothing On”
Which Celebrity Had The Best 2011
As we count down the final hours of 2011 and look forward to (perhaps drunkenly!) turning the calendar to 2012, the general consensus amongst resolution makers is the same as always: have a better next year.
For some people in Hollywood, however, keeping things exactly the same sounds like a pretty good option, too.
In a town of winners and losers, these stars came out on top in 2011, with big hits, big headlines and big smiles. From breakout stars with a career’s worth of film credits in one year to spotlight grabbers with the smarts to keep interviewers wanting more, the following celebs had some of the best years in the business.
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Which Celebrity Had The Best 2011
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